Wednesday, April 18, 2018

THE KING OF KODGERS MAKES A SPEECH----part two



...continued from 4/17/18
The training continued in 15 hour days. We spent hours and hours on the right/wrong game. That lesson alone was worth the $250 price of admission.  It has stayed with me all these years and saved me from countless useless squabbles.  I know wrong making when I see it in others and in myself and in national disputes.  (Wars are giant wrong makings)

We spent hours answering the question WHO DID IT TO US?  At the end of a tumultuous day, most of us came to see that WE DID IT TO OURSELVES!  That day was tumultuous because many of us were convinced that we were innocent victims of bad people.  THEY did it to us. 100 sad stories were presented to the trainer making that point.  The trainer let none of them get away with it.  With brilliant questioning--step by step the trainer led them to the inescapable and now obvious conclusion that WE DID IT TO OURSELVES.  The toughest challenge to the trainer came from a Jewish lady who asked if the Jews of Germany had brought the Holocaust down on their heads: Had they really done that to themselves? (I'm not sure he convinced us on that one but overall and in general I'm persuaded that I've brought most of my misery on myself.)

And even if I did not cause my misery I am very clear to this day that I AM RESPONSIBLE FOR IT-----responsible, not in the sense of causation  but simply responding to whatever shows up in my life requiring response. 

We spent long hours developing a new attitude toward problems.  Turns out, there are no problem free zones --other than death.  And that they are neither good nor bad----but simply the NEXT THING TO DO. 

How humans get screwed up was explained in a long philosophical lecture about how events of our childhood put "kinks"in our attitudes, feelings and behaviors that cause us problems in adulthood.
How to deal with our "kinks" was the aim of a major exercise.  The basic theory is that 
RE-CREATION CAUSES DISAPPEARANCE.  That is--when you look very carefully--in detail--at one of your kinks--it will slowly disappear.  (I have found this curious theory to be true for myself--and if you think about it, this is basically how Freudian therapy works)

We had a fear exercise involving a lot of yelling and at the end of which you see how foolish most of your fears are.

to be continued tomorrow......

1 comment:

  1. "I AM RESPONSIBLE FOR IT-----responsible, not in the sense of causation but simply responding to whatever shows up in my life requiring response."

    Very well stated. Without differentiating causation and response, the first part of the statement would have been an irrational platitude.

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