Saturday, July 06, 2013

DISCOVERING THE GOOD IN GOOD-BYE


OUR CARAVAN ROLLED INTO THE FOREST NEAR FLAGSTAFF TO JOIN BOB WELLS RUBBER TRAMP RENDEZVOUS.  We spent a delightful two weeks with that tribe of kindred spirits----doing the fun things I've detailed in previous blogs.

As we said our good-byes this time---I began to reflect on a years worth of goodbyes we have said as friends have engaged and disengaged with us in our travels----and I ask myself:  PRECISELY WHAT IS THE GOOD IN GOOD-BYE?

I think our good-bye's mark the moment we take possession of the gifts that association with  another personality has offered us.  For when we engage another at the level of authenticity (sharing what we really feel, think, want, have done) we see qualities in the other that we admire----AND ABSORB--into ourselves.  Bit by bit---consciously and unconsciously we absorb the qualities we admire and they become a permanent part of us---enhancing our character. 

Here's a prime example:

One morning as our time at A-1 Mountain was drawing to a close while Laurie and I were sharing eggs and sausage that she had NOT burned, Kyndal dropped by my rig to give me a lovely gift of dried fruit for our decadent oatmeal breakfasts.

Seeing that Laurie was with me, she said she had a gift for Laurie as well and would like to share it with her now,  knowing that I would also enjoy witnessing the gift since I am a poet.

She prefaced by saying she had not written a poem in over 16 years though she was inspired to do so to share her feelings about how her connection with Laurie had enhanced her life.

As she enthusiastically shared her thoughts and feelings with much laughter and delight as she recited her 'gift of love', I was so moved by what she unabashedly revealed that I later asked her if she would be comfortable if I shared her poem on
my blog because I feel it fundamentally illustrates better than any photo could the genuine impact we can have on each other when we choose to open our hearts, minds and lives to share them authentically with one another.

Good-bye Poem for Laurie from Kyndal

What had started out as some small chitter-chatter
has turned into something amazing,
something that truly matters.

Passing here & there, random words
and some funny stories
I never knew I'd meet a lifelong soul sister
with a hot chick named Laurie!

The few hours that we have spent
laughing, cuddling and crying.
I know NEVER to tell her a non-truth
for she can always tell when I'm lying.

This woman that I now call my true sister and friend,
has forever changed my world.
For there is no better morning than sharing
decadent oatmeal with lots of cherry swirl!

A smile is brought to my face due to the connection we now hold.
This love you have touched me with is so warm, yet so bold.
There will be moments that will remind me of you
and rather than crying, this is what I'll do:

I'll look at our pictures,
I'll listen to songs.
Maybe if I feel good enough
I'll dance in my thong!

Maybe a phone call or a get together,
even miles apart we're forever tethered.
I'll remember your laughter as we stood in the rain.
I'm pretty stoked you're NO plain Jane!

I'll hold every moment close to my heart.
For we will never truly be apart.
I'm not sure how I'm lucky enough to have you in my life.
But now that I do I see a closer end to certain strife.
This sisterhood we have will always be alive
For Laurie is truly what makes 'Love Rise'!

Personal message from Kyndal- Laurie you're more than an
inspiration, you're my friend! You have opened my eyes,
my mind and my heart and I can't thank you enough. I'm
super stoked we're connected and Always in All ways forever will be.
I love you. Love Kyndal

As I watched Laurie's eyes swell with tears, I could tell she had also been irrevocably touched by her heart connection with Kyndal. I felt humbled to witness their tangible affection as they shared a warm embrace once their tears subsided.

I realized that our intentions for creating "The Quest for Community Caravan were being made manifest before my very eyes. By simply having the willingness to take to the road to create a mobile community of kindred spirits on wheels we were creating life changing opportunities to live our best lives now as we navigate the frontier of the heart, mind and spirit boldly embracing the 'Heroes Journey' with other adventurers on this life enhancing expedition.
 
 


Laurie bid her good-byes to the RTR gathering by sharing a song at the final group 'stone soup' meal that was originally inspired by her Soul Sister Ginger Lauss who traveled with us last summer and was now dedicating it to the entire group in appreciation of all the lessons and blessings we shared at the summer RTR in Flagstaff for she does wholeheartedly believe 'a gift of song is a gift of love'.

As a special tribute to this summers RTR gathering Laurie created a Youtube video where you can hear her soulfully sing the 'So this is good-bye' song while viewing many of the people who have connected and engaged with the Quest for Community
Caravan and shared the joy of living, loving and learning with us as we traveled during this past year.

As her poignant song reminds us 'all that we've shared is stored deep inside the treasure chest of our minds...there for our heart's to find'. I palpably feel each individual we have connected with during this year is 'still with us' and their legacy of love remains and we will forever benefit from the ripples of this 'bonus of human association' as they echo thru time. Click here to watch



Once Kyndal and her husband James were packed up to take to the road with California being their next destination, I witnessed one of the most life affirming, love filled and celebratory good-byes of my life when James pulled their rig up
to Laurie's Casbah while blasting Kyndal and Laurie's song 'If I had a million dollars' by the Bare Naked Ladies.

Then Laurie and Kyndal broke out their 'Bubble Wand Sabers' and danced and leaped wildly in the forest while casting bubbles in the air as their side splitting laughter and joy rang through the trees as they frolicked and dueled with bubbles as James and I captured photographically what surely will become miraculous memories of them making the final moments of their fond farewell momentous!

RANDY PHILOSOPHIZES: Signed sealed and delivered----lots of good in this goodbye!

James, Kyndal, the RTR tribe and many others who have connected with our caravan are now gone --but not really---as I trust I have illustrated.

Postscript: We enjoyed our connections with the RTR folks here so immensely that we have decided to postpone our good-bye and camp with them in Belmont.  Next we will journey to the Grand Canyon for a few weeks. If you find yourself in the area, you are welcome to join us!

Click on Comments to view Laurie's heartfelt response to Kyndal's poem after she discovered this post!

6 comments:

Laurie said...

Thank you randy for posting this tribute to what you fondly refer to as 'the bonus of human association'.

Kyndal as Randy surmised, my life has been irrevocably transformed by the heart space we share.

Who you are has blessed me beyond belief and our 'like fire in the rain...so unexpected' heart connection at the Summer RTR has provided the profound catalyst for me to be able to reclaim my heart in a way that I was unable to fully embrace before choosing to cultivate a soul sister relationship with you.

As James first said we are like long lost sisters and you absolutely strike me as a younger version of myself and I a slightly older version of you since we navigate life similarly in boldly embracing all that living, loving and learning requires.

When I met you, at the risk of being too vulnerable, I was really doubting the ability for married women and single women to really be able to wholeheartedly embrace intimacy with one another without marital fear and insecurity curdling their feelings.

Yet, Kyndal you are wise beyond your years and the intimacy of our interactions called me to remember that it is the consciousness of an individual and not their relationship status that determines whether someone
can transcend fear to embrace the intimacy required of a heartfelt soul sister connection.

This has brought a great healing to my heart in witnessing how freely you offered me your love, friendship and support. Thanx for taking the lead for I must admit I was feeling a bit gun shy and reluctant to do so at the time. It will be a mentoring that I will be grateful for now and forever more.

I thank you for the heart opening poem you wrote me and will carry it with me always. It's been quite a long time since I received such a gift of love
where words become music for the mind.

The CD mix you created for me will continue to inspire and uplift me. I cherish the songs you chose and the individual comments you made about each
song. (which was sooo me!)

Each memory we have made has become a gem in the treasure chest of my mind. Decadent oatmeal with lots of cherry swirl! Sharing the first rainfall
of the year while devouring that delicious homefries breakfast James made.

You are the best playmate a soul sister could discover and I loved sharing playing the guitar and singing together, hand dancing and watching the rainbows roam about on the roof of my casbah while sharing the secrets of our souls.

I will always cherish our matching soul sister rings representing the 'infinity' of our eternal heart connection. I'm loving the lavender quartz
you gifted me and the monumentally meaningful rattlesnake rattler you gave me
from one of the two snakes that were mating only a few feet from where you were sitting!

Admittedly, this has been a tender hearted year of good-byes for me so sharing such a celebratory farewell with you as we wielded our bubble wand
sabers has really demonstrated that their can be good in a good-bye when you
discover a kindred spirit who refuses to let their ego fall prey to illusions
of separation and fear. For that I give you a standing ovation!!

I trust our heart's willalways be connected in all ways even if our paths were not to cross again. Yet, you owe me a haircut and I know you're good for it...so I do
believe we will dance in the rain once again!!

Until then my spirited friend and soul sister, know that I love you!

With much appreciation for who you are and who you are becoming and brightest blessings to you and James on the next leg of your journey.

Unleash your love...Laurie

kaBLOOnie Boonster said...

You are doing a great job of defeating the lonely ol' grouchy hermit image of RV boondocking.

I think you would be even more effective if you averted a certain image, that of the movie, Billy Jack, with all its flower child and Age of Aquarius stereotypes.

Anonymous said...

Randy...great post! Laurie...I applaud you and Kyndal for not letting fear keep you from expressing your soul sister love. I think that is what keeps lots of people from expressing their love for their friends...be they male or female...is fear. Linda in Az.

Cyndi and Stumpy said...

Thanks for sharing the RTR and Lauries video! Looking forward to reconnecting with my road family in the fall!

plantingalongtheverge.com said...

Hey Randy! Great post! I wish I could have spent more time with you guys. It was a great pleasure to meet you all and I look forward to the next time.
Happy Trails!

Glenn said...

Somehow along the way Randy's blog fell off of or out of my feed reader. Probably some house-cleaning I did after we moved on from RV to overseas travel. Today I saw him pop up on Facebook, something about an upcoming birthday. I clicked over to his page and it's full of interesting people and stories. This one in particular, with its poems, songs and slideshows reminds me of all the people we have met along the way, and all the reasons people should be reading Randy's musings.